What am I doing today, to make tomorrow even better? Are my visions where they should be?

After yesterday’s post, something just wouldn’t leave my thoughts; I kept asking myself if I was doing enough every day to make the next day even better. Is what I am doing going to be enough to get me where I need to be? Do my visions align with what the dream is or should I fine-tune them a bit?

For me that would be a simple question if there weren’t so many variables to it. So many factors could change and influence everything. Sometimes I almost feel that I have a dream, but I need to have a contingency dream (or plan) as a backup and maybe even a backup for the backup dream. In the big picture of things what I am doing on a daily basis, I think it is good. I know what I want and I am trying to get there. It’s the location and the other things that happen within my family that will determine where I get to do that at and if I will have the chance to spread my wings and fly, so-to-speak.

It’s pretty easy to just live on a day to day basis; believe me, I’ve done it. I’ve let events, friends, and opportunities pass me by out of fear, regret, and a number of other many things. In order to make that dream have a higher chance for success, I need to do a better job at embracing life. I need to hold my head up and forge on. I can’t let mistakes I have made in the past or things that others have said keep me from living this crazy thing we call life.

To be great (or however great is to be defined for me or anyone, for that matter) is takes hard work, fortitude, persistence, strength, and compassion. There are going to be good times and bad times with experiences in love, linking hate, and most importantly, it is going to take a lot of COURAGE!

Ultimately, there is someone who is very significant to me and my family that I hope I will be able to spend endless days with, exploring this world. Yes, he is one of those variables. We all love, respect, and want him in our lives more than he seems to understand. He really fails to give himself enough credit when he evaluates his self-worth to us.

Yes, I would like to see a life with him; but even if he isn’t a part of it, the ultimate dream is to move. Move to somewhere warm, somewhere preferably with a beach. I love being close to the water. I’d love nothing more than to have a little restaurant/bar in a beach town where all of the locals go and they tell all of the tourists that they have to stop there before they leave. I’m not sure that will all work out, but at least it adds more color to the dream.

Will the dream of life outside of this county that I have been in all of my life ever happen? Well, as my son reminds me of so many things, “Only time will tell.” My oldest two boys are married with great wives and are starting out what seems to be great lives. My youngest son will be a senior in high school in the fall and then it’s onto college. Will I be able to leave the kids? What if I have grandchildren? Won’t I want to be a part of their lives? Then there are my parents. My mom just had a bit of a health scare, and currently as much as I don’t want to wish time away, August 1^st can’t get here soon enough. We are in fear that there is something wrong with my dad and that there is a possibility of the onset of early dementia. However, he won’t see a doctor until August 1^st. So, if there is something wrong with either of them, will I be able to walk away and not want to do my part? If I would, that would be extremely selfish of me, wouldn’t’ it?

So, see the dream is there and I am taking steps to ensure that if the opportunity presents itself, that I can take it. I’m working to pay off all of my debt and should have that done by the end of the year. I finished my business and marketing degree, so that it would make it easier (hopefully) to find a new job, I am completing projects at my house, so if I can move, I can rent it out, sell it, or just button it up for a bit until I make a “for sure” decision. I’m doing what I can to help my kids and help them become even better established, and I am researching the heck out of possible locations and comparing pay to cost-of-living, renting  vs. purchasing a home, etc.; I think that my visions are helping me and even if I can’t move, these visions are going to provide me with the opportunity to not worry about paying the bills like I do now. The bonus is that all of the projects at my house will be done…FINALLY!

Is there more? Is there more that I can do or should do? Until the time becomes available that I can actually make a move, I think that I am preparing in about the only ways that I can; still the fact remains that even after reviewing and pondering, I still feel that I am missing something. Well Tyler…  Only time will tell.